It's a little bit funny, this feeling inside...

yes it's a little bit funny, this feeling inside - it's a Christmas feeling. It's an excited tingling lovely, warm feeling that occasionally bursts out of me in eruptions of giggles and bouncing and singing and shouting. Christmas is the celebration of the birth of my saviour, here on our lowly little planet!
He was sent for me and you and the story is just so fantastic, so incredible that we still re-tell it every year in many many ways - 2000 years on!!
It's difficult to imagine sometimes, my heavenly father being born as a baby. A little - fully dependent, naive and of course innocent baby. Totally vulnerable, totally needy and totally reliant upon his teen mother and an adopted father! If you heard the story today - you might infer many things from that introduction but it just shows it's important to hear a whole story before you decide what it's about. Recently I've been thinking more about my story, I know people won't be talking about me in 2000 years but it doesn't mean I shouldn't make the most of my time here on this lowly little planet. I really should stop putting an ending on my story, when it has only just begun!
Wonderful wonderful church on Sunday at the Forge, totally inspirational and moving. I have been caught in this loop of guilt, try, quit, guilt  many times - looks like Sunday caught me at a time when I was blindly crawling back in to guilt! yaaay!
Today brought a visit from our local vicar, a really lovely lady who spends so much of her time visiting others and really caring about their lives! I am amazed to be honest that she wanted to visit again at all - the house is such a tip! it was in a state the last time she visited also! thankfully she is such a gentle lovely person, that despite my hangups I can invite her in and drink tea with her and chat away without feeling that she is judging my lack of tidiness.
my birthday this weekend and a chance to spend time with friends and family! It's going to be brill!
well I hope you don't mind that I put down in words, how wonderful life is!
kitten out xx

old bikes, new bikes, hotels and tea parties!

Another busy few days Ladies and Gents. We have borrowed Alex's Dads' van for the weekend and brought my little 125 motorbike to sell to friends of friends in Leeds. Lovely couple, turns out it was a surprise for the lass! how ace because, I really didn't want to sell her (in my opinion all vehicles are girls) to someone who would treat her rubbishly! so that was last night, arrived at my rents in Lancashire at 1.00 am ish. Today's been a recuperating day - the weather was pretty awful on the way up last night, very foggy - though I must say it's actually quite a lovely sight - looking out at the pools of orange light that form in the fog under street lights.
Tomorrow we're off to Fleetwood to pick up our new motorbike. A Ducati ST2 for those who are interested, red and shiny! then it's back home in time for tea!
Last weekend we stayed in a posh hotel and had an evening meal and breakfast there too. We got a free room upgrade, for no particular reason - which was very posh and lovely. The food as usual was yum yum scrum! and the drink was pretty bloody fabulous too!
Trying to be a gentler person still, stress at work tipping me over the edge though at times! and overeating as a result :-( ah well, it's almost my birthday and Alex is throwing me a lovely tea party (Victorian style) for my birthday - this week I got my invite to it! gorgeous and lady - like and feminine. I really have wanted a party like this for ages, I hope it's as much fun for every one else as I know it will be for me!
hope all is well in the world of you,
kitten out x

In Remembrance with reflection

so today was remembrance day and I cried during the silence, that's right - I was actually sat at home on my own crying for a few minutes! I was thinking of all the families left without sons, brothers, uncles, fathers. I was thinking about those children who never got to meet their father, because he was killed fighting for people that he would never meet. I cried because their are wives who will never get the future with their husbands that they had dreamed of from the moment they said I do. I cried because this is still going on and now people lose, daughters, wives, sisters and mothers as well. I'm not commenting here on equality, I am just overwhelmed by a feeling of a pointless loss of life - such a lot to sacrifice! I know that I for one will praying for all those in service to our country!
on a brighter note however - it is our first wedding anniversary at the weekend - we have managed to treat ourselves to a night in a local hotel! - a posh one - yay!
got my hair cut today, which is nice!
just heard that my job may be changing in nature - again! - it's weird how change and a lack of stability can make work such a hard place to be, this of course is not helped by some peoples general negativity. But atleast I'm not in a warzone. I will however endeavour to continue, being calm, positive and gentle. I will continue being as lovely as I possibly can - after all I am an ambassador of heaven!
Kitten out x

bang, pop, whizz, squeal!

yes - fireworks, or as we tend to call them in this house wireforks!! Bury St Edmunds Abbey Gardens was the location for a lovely wirefork evening! - shared with hubby, mum in law, Henry and Cari! the fireworks themselves were so beautiful, and part of that beauty was the fact that they exist for such a very short amount of time. Like life itself, they're beautiful, bright, shiny, loud and short - lived! After the fireworks, we returned to Dawny's house and drank mulled wine with mince pies! yum yum yum - how trismassy, or Christmassy even!
All this was after a lovely day Christmas shopping in Bury St Eds - where we sorted a lot of gifts out for this year, more than we had even thought we might!! it is ace buying pressies for other ppl isn't it? - just hoping that you put a smile on their face, because Christmas carries such a warm lovely feeling and at least half of that comes from the spreading of peace and joy.
We went to church this morning, the early service again - lovely to get up and get to church - lovely worship - and a service all about being gentle and rejoicing all day every day. Hmmmm - so I wonder, am I gentle enough? I try to be a gentle Christian. I try to be non - judgemental (fail a majority of the time), calm, forgiving and real - keeping it real blud! But I don't know that I am gentle. I will try to be gentle and let you know how it goes? or if you know me or see me around, maybe you can let me know if I'm a gentle person generally?
This aft, I made 2 portions of steak in ale casserole and 2 portions of sausage casserole! we had some of the steak casserole with dumplings for dinner! then, another incredible Christmassy moment here for you, we had chestnuts roasted on our..(not) open fire! yum yum yum.
then tonight, back to the forge church for encounter - and the churches 18th birthday party! yay! I actually got up on stage and talked in to a mic to everybody there! - quite scary but much helped by the presence of the few ppl I do sort of know there - oh yeah and hubby, who I really do know!!
had an ace time and cake!
really looking forward to my birthday party - Victorian tea party - hoping people will, not only show up but also dress up and have a great time x
hope all is good in your world,
Kitten x
This afternoon

Family!

well, today has been a sad - yet hardly surprising reminder of how it only takes one sad, greedy individual to negatively effect others in the family and to remind me how difficult I find it to stay out of others business. It's always hard to see those you care about getting hurt but I'm torn between trying to help, remember it's not my place to stick my oar in and trying to be a good Christian and forgive the individual in question but - as I said to my sis tonight "grrr - it's so difficult to be forgiving to someone when they're not sorry and they're so stupidly, greedily demented!".


I really do struggle with the forgiveness thing - quite often. I find that stupid little things get me angry as well, like - has anyone else ever noticed that people are always making you promises they can't keep?! for example DFS promised me a low priced Christmas! - well, what's that all about? - they're failing me already! - in fairness I didn't actually call them or order anything from them but I'm pretty sure that that could only have made Christmas more expensive! Also - how come I can easily make a full time job out of tidying and cleaning my own house? - that's pretty much what I failed at today!!
Also had a thought or two today about how, the people we surround ourselves with can lead to us having a skewed view of the world. One where we think that a majority of the people in the world probably agree with our world view, as our friends do. This is particularly something that is brought home to me when at work and student's state their opinions "if you're ill and dying of cancer then you should just die - it's obviously nature" and "we shouldn't try to keep premature babies alive, because if we were in the wild they wouldn't live, it's not natural". Gobsmacked is not the word dear friends! I have been shocked like this a few times now and in each case these are not students who are particularly "naughty" or "just trying to get a rise" - in fact their peer group seemed more surprised that I had views that differed to theirs! I'm not saying they aren't welcome to their own views but, I certainly hadn't expected to hear them spoken in such a frank (and whilst we're talking frankly, insensitive) way. So what can we do, to avoid narrow-mindedness on all sides, COMMUNICATION, is the only way!
still though - a lovely weekend coming up, bonfire and fireworks display on Saturday, church (twice) on Sunday, Liz and Graham's and the girls for takeaway on Monday. 
WoOt wOoT!
kitten out x

attitudes, lifestyle, Christmas and work.

so it was back to work yesterday after a 2 week half term. The 2 week thing, actually a bit of a sore point as it means I lose a weeks pay this year off last year - but in a more positive approach - it did mean I got to see some of my family, get on top of some housework and have lie - ins. Work, yesterday was a difficult place to return to but I have decided to try really hard to stay positive and become a better representative for Christ and Christianity. So the positive things that happened included, catching up with friends and having a laugh, not being stuck in the house, working with students and helping them with assignment work, seeing some of those students really blossom with gained confidence and starting to work on project study skills!. I might add at this point that I certainly wasn't feeling this positive yesterday or last night but in hindsight attitude is sometimes everything!
Christmas is coming, I know there are those who would rather I didn't talk about it so soon but hey - I love it, I love the generous spirits, the giving and receiving of gifts that should represent a true feeling of closeness and love  and the true meaning of Christmas, the arrival of my saviour on earth. Also - it's an excuse to stuff yourself, though it probably shouldn't be!
hubby brought home chocolates tonight, what a superstar!
kitten out x

a brilliantly busy weekend

So yesterday saw Alex and I heading into Ipswich for a meeting with a bank, trying to change banks at the mo - long story, so the shortened version is that a certain bank that we are trying to leave charged us a stupid amount for going accidentally overdrawn for 1 day and a bit!
Anyway - that hasn't yet gone through but we spent the rest of the day in Ipswich, Christmas shopping, we spent some money on the market ready to make some presents. Can't give too much away on here, as I don't know who might be reading
;-)
last night, we had the dine in for £10 steak and chips from M and S - it was basically a date at home - very lovely, totally schlubbly bub!
This morning, forge church! Amazing as usual - it was Matt Levett. Another in the inspirational "The journey" series - got me feeling very spiritual and excited about God (again!).
We went to Asda after church and managed to spend £60 - on not a lot! ouch!
then back home and present making :-D
Spot of gardening this evening followed by (naughty) Chicken for tea! yum yum.

It is nearly Christmas and it's at this time of the year, more than many others that I think of those people that have little or nothing! i have so much! friends, family, comfort, health and health care, food and drink and most of all hopes and dreams! They are worth so much!
love to you all,
kitten out x

what is the world coming to?

I watched some of BBC 24 tonight (this morning if being pedantic). The high death tolls are depressing. Pakistan, Haiti and Indonesia - not to mention the ongoing untold deaths in war zones such as Iraq and Afghanistan. But what I found more depressing was the way these numbers didn't shock me like they should. Is it just that we hear more and more in this modern technological age? Is it perhaps the way that the presenter so - coldly - gives the facts? I am reminded of the way that Trevor McDonald cried when presenting one news piece. I know I know, who wants to see an emotional news reader right? just the clean simple facts - like who and where and how many?! but to me it's just a bit wrong that those numbers don't shock me any more. I spent some time watching news reports of long ago tonight. The change though wasn't in presenting style but in how each story seemed to highlight the humanity of the stories and people involved. I don't often watch the news in all honesty, my bad. The thing is that I normally hear/read enough to get a bit of a picture anyway without quite such a desperate feeling of helplessness that usually accompanies the news. The woman just went "300 dead and hundreds more missing" as if she was talking about flowers or something! Can't blame the woman - she's doing her job but it just seems wrong that on the one hand we are exposed to so much of the worlds problems and on the other we seem removed from them. Perhaps it's just me though? in which case please feel free to ignore my tired ramblings,
I will pray for the world tonight because,
the world is coming (at some point, believe me I don't know when) - to the kingdom of God!
love to y'all (American accent required for that final bit),
kitten x
P:s - Alex and I invested in a motorbike today to increase our adventures next year! lol

so it's 1.03 am and I'm up and writing!

why? I hear you cry well, I put this down to a number of reasons!
1) I did nothing all day - and so I am not worn out enough
2) the above makes me feel guilty and so I feel the need to get up and do stuff
3) Had big conversations with hubby tonight, regarding the future and some really important decisions. These focussed around the fact that for some time now I and in fact I believe both of us, have been really wanting to start a family. This has led to decisions being made including, career decisions, house decisions and even car decisions focussing around the goal of a family. However I have to say that more recently I have also desperately been craving adventure. Now that's not to say that a family wouldn't bring adventure! but - it just has felt that Alex and I have often chosen to live quite a sensible serious life, goal driven always to the next thing. But I have missed seeing and going places as a result. so the discussion so far has suggested that perhaps the family can wait just a little bit longer? and next year - could perhaps be like a gap year?? only with work! lol
well anyway - lots to think and pray about - and not enough sleep.
just heard a bird flying over head - squawking and squealing like a mad thing, no idea what that was about - probably telling me to shut up and go back to bed! ah well!
finally to leave you with a quote that I think relevant to my current worries regarding ease, comfort and a lack of imagination and energy for my age! - perhaps I am simply, already past my youth! but if that is the case, then I am going to give it one helluva good wake!

"The youth gets together his materials to build a bridge to the moon, or, perchance, a palace or temple on the earth, and, at length, the middle-aged man concludes to build a woodshed with them" Henry David Thoreau 


kitten out x

hmmm - an uneventful day!

yep - the title says it all !
tomorrow I must, however do - something, pretty much anything will do!
lol
so - will report back tomorrow!
kitten out x

What a day - ups and downs and roundabouts!

well it's been a day of dizzy highs and bad time lows :-(
High Point - better nights sleep than one before and a lie in!
Low Point - watched some of X Factor, felt dirty!
High Point - lovely walk with sis and hubby, round Worden park
Low point - stupid arguments with lovely hubby
High point - roast chicken dinner (and lovely wine)
Low point - eating too much of said lovely dinner
High Point - getting recipe for stuffing off dad for Christmas dinner
Low Point - Having to pack up and leave mum and dad's - I do miss 'em!
High Point - meeting Sarah for a drink on the way Home!
Low point - missing Louis on same trip :-(
High Point - realising not long till my birthday or Christmas!!
Low point - sad making misunderstanding on the way home
High point - home to see Tiger, kiss and make up and it's bed time now!

kitten out x

oop North!

so - long lie in this morning,

then off to try some boots on this aft - they didn't fit :-( maybe it's a Cinderella style boot! I don't have Cinderella style calves ( as in calf muscles sorry, not baby cows)

went to subway for lunch, then back to the rents and off for more shopping, this time to Lidl, I pronounce this as in Liddle and never say Leedul! - I don't know why this annoys me so much - it probably shouldn't as it's not an English company but still, it just does.

Alex went and fell in love with a new bike instead, in fairness this is not news as a bike should be on the cards in the new year. All part of a promise to ourselves to adventure a little more. Its a Ducati Multistrada, so I'll be off to sit on the pillion seat of one of those in the not too distant future. Hubby rocks,

off for a family meal tonight with Gill (sister), hubby, the rents and my aunty. We haven't been able to book a table so wish us luck!

I will be very sad to miss church AGAIN in the morning :-(

hope all is well in your world?!

kitten out x

another good day.

So today has been a really good day on the whole. Meeting this morning went well - remarkably well! it only took 20 mins and we all came out smiling so on to the next stage of getting the planning permission. I am so proud of my man, he is just so clever and talented. Thank you to anybody who was sending us happy vibes for our meeting, they worked!
After that I got home wrapped Eva's pressy, hung some washing out, ordered the shopping and shoved some lunch down before going to work for the afternoon ( some training! - very positive on the whole - looking forward to going back after half term TBH)
Then back home to pack for the weekend + bring the washing in and now I'm gonna get dinner on and then we're off to see Eva and then on to the North! yay!
can any one else feel Christmas in the air?
big love,
Abysinnia,
kitten x

you're making me dizzy, my head is spinning!

I banged my head today - it hurts and a I feel slightly dizzy with it! Don't panic - it's not bad, just very slight!
Before I did that I raked up a lovely big pile of leaves off the lawn. It reminded me of being a child and there was a part of me that wanted to just throw them up in the air and roll around in them, but the more adult side complained of having worked too hard and it complained louder! lol
Also sorted through my conker collection - probably best not to ask!
I have little else to write today! how boring? I know!
big important planning meeting tomorrow - so love and luck and prayers are welcome, also going to see the family in the north for the weekend so not sure when I'll be on here next, hopefully not too long!
Struggling to communicate effectively today at all :-( hmmm - ah well
take care all,
kitten out x

It just doesn't ever stop though - does it?

Life that is... I mean some times you feel like if you just had time to get over one thing, you could have coped with the next thing easier. For example Grandma Pat and Grandad Jack, Grandma had just got out of hospital when Grandad broke his hip, Grandad was starting to get better when Grandma got the flu and so on. I heard today that my plans for paid work experience for this year - won't work out as planned - the offer of pay having since been removed. Not a big deal really, I shouldn't perhaps be upset about losing something that I never had and in all fairness at least I still have a job right? - and the opportunity to do my PGCE, with more relevant practice, next year which is a lot more than (I suspect) a majority of the people in the world. I feel somehow like this wouldn't have made me feel so sad though if I hadn't already had so many of my hours cut back and henceforth lost so much money compared to last year. Once again I want to add that I know that there are very many people out there a lot worse off than me though and I am so grateful for everything that I have. But somehow it just feels a bit like some days, just as you're getting over some of the stuff from the not too distant past and you think you've worked out a solution to some of your problems another obstacle appears. Interesting though, as today's wordlive seemed particularly relevant :-


"Are you facing an impossible situation at the moment? Maybe you can’t see the way out or the solution right now but that doesn’t mean there isn’t one.

Ask the Lord to help you lift your eyes off the problem and onto him"

The scripture for today was the feeding of the 5000, the reading suggests that whilst the disciples are constantly looking for solutions to the problems, 5000 hungry people including themselves and no food - Jesus who's eyes are firmly fixed on the Lord is therefore better equipped to deal calmly with the situation and can see the answers. 

Now I'm not saying I will ever be as Calm or Godly or miraculous as Jesus, but I can try and stay calm - right? I can keep turning back to him! 

The parents and the chihuahuas have returned to the North. I would be saying here how much I miss them already, but knowing that we're off to see them on Friday - makes it difficult to feel sad and means it feels a bit like just a chance to be alone for a very little while.

We managed to see G'ma and G'dad tonight, Grandad is still poorly but seemingly better than he was in hospital - which is brill! we took him some presents and offered help where possible! - I do love to help when I can! really makes me smile 

:-D

sleepy now,

so kitten out x

there is such a thing as too much of a good thing!

Good Food, Good Drink, Good Places to be, Beautiful Shops - all of this makes kitten a sleepy tired lady! still though that's definitely nothing to complain about!
Ickworth house was hysterical today, the Herveys, as a family sound like they lived life to it's fullest. Now I'm not saying that I want to be a part of a family that has a history including numerous incidents infidelity, illegitimate children, drug smuggling and gun running amongst other bizarre acts, that no doubt left a lot of hurt and destruction as well. But I have to say there is something appealing about the kind of a life that includes a lot of travel, exploration and interest in art and beauty. A kind of passion for life that I don't think should be reserved for those with tonnes of money. Yes I enjoyed today!
Also I had forgotten how addictive people history can be, I guess it's the nosy side of me - the part of us humans that created "reality" programs, because we like to know what other people get up to!
lunch was yummy,
steak and red wine for tea - I am feeling both spoilt and ruined!
kitten out x

Angles, Bags, Chinese and Dogs!

well - the rents and I (and the chihuahuas) went to West Stow Country Park and Anglo Saxon Village today! I was struck by how comfortable those little huts actually were. It took remarkably little for the Saxons to stay settled in Stow for 200 years! I obviously have - so far - had a lack of commitment when it comes to settling in one place. But in all seriousness, the fires (beautiful smells) - the wood  - some fabrics - some means of feeding yourself and some place to sit +/ sleep - made those huts seem so homely and warm and comfortable. Yet I didn't obviously remember this lesson of simple, none materialism once we got into the gift shop, NEW BAG = droooooll.
The dogs had a great time too - they barked at anything and everything that moved and got tea and scone!
Chinese for Tea! yum yum yum.
kitten out x

ok - so I decided it was about time!

Hi all,
Kitten here, or Cat or Catherine or whoever you know me as?!
I'm new at this whole blogging thing - but decided it was about time that I got some of this stuff down, my blog will involve bits of things about my life and thoughts from time to time. Basically it's all about the journey. The title has been kind of stolen/borrowed from a series at church called the journey.
we were at church this morning and it was just such a humbling, amazing service. All about being a light/a breath of fresh air - for God.

"In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in

heaven." (Matthew 5:14-16)

So - who knew? - it's all about good deeds! not talking the talk, but walking the walk! lol well with the help of all my family and friends I'm going to try and change my walk!
Also - have decided that I really crave some adventure, I can't keep on just living like this - craving comfort and ease all the time! where's the adventure?! There's so much I want to experience, so many things to see and do! hopefully soon I can start adventuring!
God Bless,
kitten x